Fear of Success

“Hot, very hot summer. I can’t remember a heat wave like this since 1850” said the old farmer. "Indeed, Sir” replied the young man, while unloading the heavy plow off his shabby wagon. The skinny horse moved restlessly, trying to wave off the flies on his nose. On his way home, David could feel his painful back. His shirt was soaked with the long day’s sweat of delivering farming equipment since early morning. He was 25, an ex - soldier, who did his best to make a living. His horse was a faithful friend, taking him everywhere. He would go to distant farms, small stores and other places in the dusty regions of Arizona to meet his clients' needs. 
        
By dust, he would go back to his modest tent, not being able to afford more than this, eat some bread and wine, and fall into a deep sleep leading up to another hard work day. Unlike David, most residents of the small town were looking for gold. They spent their time by the river banks, screening the water, hoping to find some golden crams that were then sent to Harvey, the melting house owner. 
        
Big wagons, escorted by an armed guard would then carry the gold to the big city. Often case, bandits ambushed the carriages, killed the passengers and robbed the gold. Mr. Harvey kept changing the routes in order to outsmart the robbers, sometimes successfully, sometimes not.
        
It was another blazing August day, and David was on his way home very late at night. His body yearned for rest and his mind came up with an idea. He had a reputation for being a hard working and honest guy, carrying commodities, tools and furniture. Maybe he would be able to persuade Mr. Harvey to let him carry the gold in his beat up carriage, with no guards, so they would deceive the robbers. The money that he could possibly make would allow him to rest his body for a whole week, regain his strength, and go back to work. It was a dangerous mission but the reward was very compelling. 
        
The next morning, David met with Mr. Harvey and they decided to do it on Thursday night. Loading up the carriage was quick and smooth. The two chests of gold were well hidden among the dirty plows and sacks and David left in the dead of night. He knew very well the trails and junctions and navigated his way bravely in the pitch darkness. 

“Oh, they’re shooting me in the chest, I didn’t see them, it’s so painful!” he screamed and became quiet right away. 
        
“What a beautiful white light! I’m floating upwards, what an amazing feeling of calmness. I see everything. Then the  bandits take the two chests and take off. They even take my beloved horse, such a shame.” Said David as he watches his past life in Arizona in the 19th century.
        
“Let’s take a few deep breaths and remember this is only an old movie” I reminded him. “How did the robbers know to ambush you?” I was curious. "There was an insider. The receptionist guy at Harvey’s. He told them” He replied quickly. “What conclusions did you take from your past life onto the current life?” I asked. “Money is dangerous, it will kill me. You shouldn’t be greedy. I had a good job, made decent money. It was just enough. I asked David to compare his past life to today’s. 
        
“Until 8 years ago, I was a cop. I got fired due to circumstances beyond my control, politics and such." Then he got excited and said: "You know what? My commander, the one who fired me instead of my partner who screwed up, he’s the traitor receptionist from Arizona! The one who caused my death! Unbelievable!” David got quiet for a few seconds. “I’ve decided to start my own business, however I can’t make a breakthrough and make the big money. I have the know-how, the experience, but it feels as if something is blocking me.” He paused to ponder upon his own words. “Now I know why. Deep inside I believe that a little is enough and that you can’t make money easily and honestly. Either you break your back and put your blood and sweat into it, or you go for the “easy money” and then the greed will cost you your life.” He summarized his thoughts.

David opened his eyes with a big “wow”. “I feel great now. Everything opened up. I intend to put everything in my new business, a green limousine service. I know I’ll be successful.” He said enthusiastically. “More power to you” I encouraged him. “Back then you transported goods – now people!”

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